“The Body Remembers What the Mind Tries to Forget”: A Reflection on Trauma, Healing, and the Wisdom Within

By Barbara Wilde

In his groundbreaking book The Body Keeps the Score, psychiatrist Bessel van der Kolk offers a vital truth: “Trauma results in a fundamental reorganisation of the way mind and brain manage perceptions.” It doesn’t just change what we think about—it alters how we think, and even our very capacity to think. This insight has transformed not only the way we understand trauma, but also the way we approach healing.

As a life coach working with women on the path of self-discovery and empowerment, I have witnessed how trauma is often not just a memory of the past—it is a felt experience that lives in the body, silently dictating our reactions, postures, and emotional states. Clients may find the words to tell their stories—words that carry immense meaning and release—but their bodies often continue to brace for danger, long after the danger has passed.

Van der Kolk writes that storytelling alone is rarely enough. “The act of telling the story doesn’t necessarily alter the automatic physical and hormonal responses of bodies that remain hypervigilant, prepared to be assaulted or violated at any time.” In other words, even when the mind understands, the body may still be fighting a war that is no longer being waged.

This is where coaching becomes more than a conversation. It becomes a space for re-embodiment. I often ask my clients: What is your body telling you today? In the rush of daily life, we are trained to override our physical sensations. We ignore tension in the jaw, a tight chest, or shallow breath. We minimise fatigue. But the body speaks in whispers before it screams. Trauma, anxiety, and emotional suppression often manifest through the body first—long before they take shape in our thoughts.

This is why integrating somatic awareness into the coaching journey is so powerful. Simple practices—like grounding your feet, observing your breath, or scanning the body for areas of tension—can begin to restore the connection between your inner world and your physical self. In particular, I have found that gentle yoga techniques, such as yin or trauma-informed yoga, can create a bridge between dissociation and presence. These practices are not about performance or flexibility—they are about listening, softening, and releasing.

Yoga teaches us to be with what is, without judgment. Holding a pose with mindful breath invites us to stay with discomfort in a safe and controlled way—a skill that trauma survivors often need to rebuild. Through consistent practice, the body begins to learn a new truth: I am safe now. I can inhabit this moment.

From a coaching perspective, this embodied approach is essential. True transformation happens when we align thought, emotion, and physical experience. Only then can we access our full range of aliveness and freedom. As van der Kolk reminds us, healing does not mean forgetting. It means learning to live in the present without being hijacked by the past.

So I invite you—today, and each day—to pause and ask yourself not just How am I feeling? but Where am I feeling it? Your body holds clues to your story, and within it, the first steps toward reclaiming your peace.